tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post2486425696676402603..comments2023-10-21T10:00:25.485-05:00Comments on Union, Trueheart, and Courtesy: Sibling therapydonnadbhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09580583133757807126noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-69567629789500605902008-03-03T12:17:00.000-06:002008-03-03T12:17:00.000-06:00You have beautiful children. I think they'll be go...You have beautiful children. I think they'll be good for each other. <BR/>If I may make a comment on having more than one child to (save? prevent? protect?) one's first offspring from being an "only child." I want to go on record as being very much in favor of only children. I'm one and so is my son. We're both like people but we're also very comfortable with being by ourselves. Neither are we selfish, spoiled or odd, as only children are sometimes labeled. My husband has two siblings, one of whom refuses to talk to him (long story) and the other whom he rarely sees. His childhood was a nightmare of jealousy and com petition. Mine was placid and I felt very loved. It seems prejudice against only children is one of the few prejudices left that people feel very safe in expressing openly. My husband and I have the resources to send our son the the best schools and to take him with us when we travel throughout the world. Being an only child has given him many opportunities he wouldn't have experienced if we had to count pennies because we had more children to provide for.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-67886176804083811202008-01-14T16:42:00.000-06:002008-01-14T16:42:00.000-06:00I agree with doc thelma. Every decision to have a ...I agree with doc thelma. Every decision to have a second (or third, or whatever number) child has implications specifically on the first child. I wanted a second child to accompany my first child through life, and hopefully adulthood; to navigate the waters of their parents' old age with support from each other; to provide a playmate, friend, and companion to teach compassion, patience, sharing and love. I also considered that children with siblings have statistically lower IQs, that they would likely not be able to attend private schools, or have other pricey academic benefits, due to the financial constraints of additional children. The fact that anyone would criticize you for considering the positive impact a sibling could have on Archer just proves that too many people need to find fault wherever they look. Shame on them. You and Noel are awesome parents.Maureenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03202673797468505333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-87421845648925698252008-01-14T16:05:00.000-06:002008-01-14T16:05:00.000-06:00It's worth noting what Archer has done for Cady Gr...It's worth noting what Archer has done for Cady Gray as well. His interest in reading and math has encouraged her in those areas, and his preference for order means that she's generally well-behaved, just from following his lead.<BR/><BR/>When the time comes, and she begins to understand the ways that Archer is different, we'll make it clear to her that she was not brought into this world to be responsible for him. But they get along so well now that I'm hoping she'll eventually come to appreciate what a unique experience she's had (and having).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-34591196689887586682008-01-14T14:15:00.000-06:002008-01-14T14:15:00.000-06:00It's interesting... if Archer was not austistic a...It's interesting... if Archer was not austistic and you had just listing one of your reasons for having a second as "we didn't want him to be an only child" I doubt anyone would question your ethics. But as soon as you can point to a <I>specific</I> reason why having a sibling would be good for the first-born (chance for improved social skills for an autistic child, chance for life-saving umbilical stem cell therapy for a cancer patient), you find your ethics questioned. As if the "specific" reason precludes your loving and treasuring the second child for his/her own sake, but all the general reasons don't.<BR/><BR/>Good for Archer! I'm always thrilled to hear about his progress.Doc Thelmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07901438460235363726noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-61583559807622070702008-01-14T07:26:00.000-06:002008-01-14T07:26:00.000-06:00What a heartfelt post Donna. Not to imply you don'...What a heartfelt post Donna. Not to imply you don't normally write from the heart, but this was really moving. Thanks for sharing.Eric Grubbshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08237140729566147948noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-48363762822624854002008-01-13T22:04:00.000-06:002008-01-13T22:04:00.000-06:00Of course, the real point of this story is that I'...Of course, the real point of this story is that I'm a terrible father for refusing to play ball with my kid. Cat's in the cradle, man.<BR/><BR/>(In my defense, there were still some chips on my plate, and it was five minutes before naptime.)<BR/><BR/>-NoelAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-36534716811261605862008-01-13T21:32:00.000-06:002008-01-13T21:32:00.000-06:00Aww.It was sweet to see how well Archer and Cady G...Aww.<BR/><BR/>It was sweet to see how well Archer and Cady Gray got along when I was there. Or maybe they just put on a good show for visitors? :)the secret knitterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01644338306685648097noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2792307050609117515.post-42247557049336731012008-01-13T20:32:00.000-06:002008-01-13T20:32:00.000-06:00I love reading about your children. Please answer...I love reading about your children. Please answer me this: Did Santa bring Cady Gray a tutu for Christmas?Tim Siskhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17308385463977574600noreply@blogger.com