Saturday in list form

1. 8:15 am: Noel leaves for the Little Rock airport. His flight doesn't leave until noon, but he's anxious to enjoy free wi-fi and a beer with lunch without being interrupted to find a magnadoodle. I can't blame him.
2. 9:45 am: The kids and I go to the library for new books and storytime. There is only one other child a storytime, a girl whose mother has disappeared for the duration. The kids sing "Jingle Bells" while accompanying themselves on actual jingling bells. Space Case makes his second yearly holiday appearance, much to my delight. Full disclosure: I frequently whisper "The location of my origin is outer space" to myself.
   
3. 10:45 am: Off to lunch at Chili's, as per Saturday ritual. Cady Gray insists on ordering cheese pizza.
4. 12:20 pm: While the kids have rest time in their rooms, I watch two episodes of Rehab: Party at the Hard Rock Hotel that have been cluttering up the TiVo for quite a while. The girls who wanted Ja Rule to pay for their bar bill were real pieces of work. So were the couple who claimed they had been told the $200 beverage minimum at their cabana was actually a $200 all-you-can-eat-and-drink "inclusive" deal, and refused to pay their (comparatively meager) $500 tab.
5. 2:15 pm: Off to Target with the kids to buy stocking stuffers and angel tree gifts. The place was bursting at the seams with dead-eyed shoppers. I didn't have much fun purchasing travel-sized toiletries and post-it notes (our motto: only useful stuffers this year, no cheap plastic crap bought just for the heck of it) because I was constantly worried that I'd get separated from the kids in the unprecedented crush. There was actually a traffic jam at every entrance and exit in the parking lot.
6. 3:20 pm: A stop at Hancock Fabrics to find some buttons for my mom's Christmas present. I told the kids to look for big ones, and they were tickled to find a display of "The Big Button" brand buttons. They kept calling me over to look at them, howling with delight.
7. 3:45 pm: Home again. Kids watch an episode of The Price Is Right on the TiVo while I check e-mail. Then they play in the front room while I heat up vegetable and noodle soup and make peanut butter sandwiches.
8. 5:20 pm: Because the kids have been good sports all day and because their usual Target/Starbucks cookie treat was rendered impossible by the massive crowds, we go out for a hot fudge sundae.
   
9. 6:00 pm: Wheel of Fortune followed by two games each of Kirby's Pinball Land on the Super Game Boy. Archer stays on couch for the entire show, a possibly unprecedented feat. In the mail: A Lionsgate screener of W., somewhat forlorn.
10. Later: Catching up on things Noel has already seen while he's away, Part 1: The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button. And possibly Part 2: The first 80 minutes of Man On Wire.